The boxing gloves are on . . .

“This is what the Lord says to you: ‘Do not be afraid or discouraged because of this vast army. For the battle is not yours, but God’s.’”  2 Chronicles 20:15

I know – a pathetic self-portrait – but I knew I couldn’t do a serious face if someone was behind the camera. Pretty intimidating, huh? Honestly though, this cancer should be shaking in its boots. You see, cancer, I hated, um no, I despised you since that fateful day on April 12. If I could’ve ripped you out myself, you would be history. How dare you have the audacity to lurk inside my body unannounced for five years. Who do you think you are spreading to my C7 vertebrae? I hate you because you have been sneaky and you are bent on destruction. Because of your nastiness, I have . . .

-- met with 8 doctors
-- gone to 16 appointments
-- undergone 6 MRIs, 4 CT Scans, 1 PET Scan, 1 Bone Scan
-- given numerous vials of blood
-- had 3 biopsies
-- had one round of radiation
-- had a port installed in me

And now, I will undergo 6 cycles of chemotherapy to destroy you and the microscopic traces you have left in my body. I realize this is only the beginning of blood work, scans, another surgery and possibly more radiation & chemo (along with their ugly side effects). And perhaps, many more gross days.

Yes, you may be smiling now. You may relish watching me cry as my head is shaved or when I feel weak & discouraged. You may think you have won. However, the bad news for you is that you chose the wrong person to mess with. Maybe you didn’t do a personality test before you chose me. Let’s just say you were a bit naïve. You see, I am incredibly strong-willed. I am stubborn to a fault. When I don’t like something, it’s really not a good thing for the object I dislike. I am competitive and don’t like losing. I just want you to know, my boxing gloves are on, and even though I can’t even fit my clawed-up right hand in this red padded glove, I want you to know there is power in my punch. You are still laughing, huh? Well, you better listen up . . .

-- I have A LOT to live for – I have an incredible husband, a precious daughter, a fabulous family & a growing circle of friends I love to pieces. These relationships have only grown stronger because of you.
-- I have the will to live – be it through laughter, nutrition, exercise or rest. I will do whatever I can to make sure my body is no longer a hospitable environment for your poison.
-- I have a brilliant medical team who has experience and technology to send you reeling. (By the way, how are your friends doing in my C7 vertebrae after some targeted burn treatment?) Fair warning - your “shock & awe” is next.

Oh, so you aren’t feeling threatened yet? Keep listening . . .

-- I have an vast ARMY of prayer warriors interceding on my behalf. And let me tell you, they are dedicated. They are praying for my total healing and God’s glory. This army is so extensive, I haven’t even met most of them. But we have one thing that draws us together in unity – we pray & believe BIG because we all serve a BIG God.

Bottom line, cancer, the God I serve, the God you had to ask permission to be allowed in my body, the God who spoke all of creation into existence by His spoken Word, the God who loved His creation enough to provide a rescue plan – He is my God. Yep, the God of . . .

-- Noah
-- Abraham
-- Jacob
-- Joseph
-- Moses
-- David
-- Daniel
-- Esther
-- Peter
-- John
-- Paul

He is my God too. He doesn’t work according to the ways of man. His ways are higher. He loves to do the impossible. Healing is in His hands. He is jealous for His glory and He desires to do immeasurably more than we could ask or imagine. He is always good and faithful. He is sovereign. And, He is in control . . . not you!! (If you don’t believe me, I will send you scripture references for all of the above because I know you despise Truth. You flee from its presence.)

Ultimately, I can self-will you to go away but I am powerless to do so. I realize my tough talk and ammo (boxing gloves & all) is pretty pathetic. But with God on my side, this battle is no longer mine. This battle is His.

I am reading Daniel right now, and I am encouraged by what the scriptures say about him . . .

“So Daniel was taken up out of the den and no injury whatever was found on him, because he had trusted in his God.”  Daniel 6:23

Daniel was delivered from the mouths of ravenous lions, without even a scratch . . . why? . . . because Daniel trusted in His God. There wasn’t anything special about Daniel. He wasn’t super brave or extra-strong because of self-belief. His strength (and ultimate deliverance) came from His deep, abiding trust in His Father. That is where I take my stand. I face my first round of chemo tomorrow. It feels like my ravenous den of lions, but I am trusting in my God for deliverance from this terrible disease. I know, if He chooses, He will heal me completely and He WILL receive all of the glory. So, cancer, if you haven’t felt the storm a-brewing, it’s time to put on your big boy pants. We are ready to fight and we’ll be doing most of it on our knees, because my General is God and He is a God of hope and healing!!

”Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character, and character, hope.” Romans 5:3-4

PRAYER REQUESTS
-- I go in tomorrow (rather today) at 8:30 am for my first round of chemo. It should take 2 1/2-3 hours (start-to-finish). I would include the side effects but didn’t want to write four pages and this is only the side effects for my first drug.

-- We are praying, ultimately, that the chemo will be effective (eradicate all cancer & evaporate tumor on my right forearm).

-- We are praying for limited or no side effects.

-- For courage, strength and a deep trust in my God and what He’s doing. I am nervous about this next step. I am anxious about what I’ll see, hear & experience. I want to be light, so I pray my personal fears would be overshadowed by Him within me. For encouragement and His goodness to be evident throughout the day,

-- My port is doing much better today, I was greatly encouraged by the healing progress but it is still very tender at the site. Please pray the insertion needle would not be horribly painful, as I’ve been told to expect it to be on the first try especially so close to the port being installed.

-- Of course, we continue praying the radiation is working mightily in my C7 vertebrae.

Okay gang, I hope you are ready to fight with me. I need you all like never before. Let’s go God and show that cancer You’re boss!